Sunday, January 03, 2010

thanks and no thanks

First of all, a huge thanks to all of the comments and emails of support, of sympathy and empathy. I can't express how refreshing it is to hear from others who have gone, or are still going through, the same things we are right now. Your words and offers of kindness lift me up when I need it most.

But I want to also say, to those who instead of feeling called to offer support and constructive advice to us feel the need to question, doubt, accuse or even threaten, either directly or through others, that this is my blog and my heart and just like any quick read out there, if you don't want to hear what I have to say then just close the book.

Despite Em's continuing issues, she is still quite a different child than we brought home 7 months ago yesterday. She smiles at us and everyone she meets, she greets people with the cutest approximation of "hi" you've ever heard, and she is overall a very happy little girl. Sometimes it's easy to forget about all the progress she has made, to get absorbed in the stuff we are still working on, but we are reminded often when family who haven't seen her in a couple months marvel at how different she is and how present she is now. I don't post about that much because well, I don't post much at all anymore LOL. And often I am driven to post because I desperately need to let my thoughts out of my head, to get them written down so I can let them go and start fresh again.

Adoption is not a Hallmark card. Especially when you're dealing with international special needs adoption from a second-world country. And I say that becacuse it needs to be said, because it begs for someone to say it. And I will keep saying it in every post I make - the hopeful ones and the miserable ones - because it is about time that people start figuring out how best to support reality instead of how best to work out the lumps it leaves after being swept under the rug.

If you come to my blog with a broom and a rolling pin, thanks but no thanks. It might be time to move on.